that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
