How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
