5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
