doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
