he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
