as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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