why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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