Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize