this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
