how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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