you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
