who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
