...so i touched it.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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