so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
My cat gives me a boner
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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