At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Randomize
