In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
