How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
