I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
