there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
