At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Randomize