Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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