she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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