I got chris browned last night
I want you more than these girls want KFC
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize