I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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