I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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