At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
