Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Dick very happy bro
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
