what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
