So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Randomize
