I don't usually arrange sex via text message
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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