No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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