about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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