You're a womanizer and a bitch.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
