Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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