I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Randomize
