Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
