i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Just invented taco cereal.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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