Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
