Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize