I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
