you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Randomize
