My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
