"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize
