Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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