It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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