dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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