How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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