Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
