I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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