So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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