He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize